For answers to questions and curiosities and to arrange a visit – just call ahead.
For answers to questions and curiosities and to arrange a visit – just call ahead.
In truth it is likely that there are as many definitions and answers as there are practitioners. Still, it’s a fair question.
Definitions and descriptions of massage ‘techniques’ e.g. Swedish, Lomi Lomi, Thai, Reiki etc. can easily be researched and described definitively but defining ‘relaxing’ in massage is more subjective.
Any relaxing massage experience is hopefully designed to be a pleasant experience, but what of the question defining the descriptions of full body – relaxing – erotic – Tantric. Isn’t it all the same?
Happily it is normal to experience a relaxing massage as an erotic experience even if it’s not ‘full body’. Simple touch, in the right circumstance can be incredibly and surprisingly erotic. Certainly a ‘full body’ relaxing massage, is likely to result in an erotic experience.
Tantric massage sessions tend to be longer than simple full body relaxation massage. Perhaps Tantric massage is best defined as a shared journey, where natural energy and reactions are mutually enjoyed by both receiver and giver.
There is always a ‘safe landing’ and the effects of the experience can last for many days afterwards.
In Tantric massage the experience is always about the journey without undue focus on the destination. Relaxation massage, erotic massage, full body massage, therapeutic massage, Tantric massage, combinations of all – it’s all good.
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Tantric practice encourages the idea of an ‘experience’ rather than a ‘session’, whether or not the time is in massage, ritual, discovery or any combination of Tantric practice.
Such experience is timeless – in that the experience tends to find its own unique pace and is not necessarily divided into hourly segments.
For this reason ‘clock watching’ is not part of Tantric experience. The idea is to provide an experience to relax the mind and body and thereby raise physical consciousness and heighten awareness. How this develops in any individual will be unique to the moment and certainly the benefit can be defeated by watching the clock too closely. That’s not to say that time constraints are not a reality to be respected at times. Just that experiences, short or long, need not necessarily be measured by the clock.
If Tantric practice requires anything from followers, those requirements, at least, are an open and curious mind and a generosity of spirit. So we always approach experiential time with generosity not measured by hours and minutes.
Sometimes the experience will last long – other times it maybe shorter. Always, though, it will be a unique experience – never a ‘timed session’. We don’t always have to make the massage ‘run on time’!
These labels are often simply flimsy figments of imagination, ready to be blown away with a puff of positive energy.
Often, potential peace of mind is denied by imagining and internalizing a self identity – a label that seems to fit in a personal universe.
But are the labels really useful and a best fit? If there are too many mismatches it can be uncomfortable to exist in the world. Since it’s more difficult to change the world than it is to change a few psychic assumptions, Tantric practice works on taking thoughts to more productive and happier places – and so to greater peace of mind.
Tantra deals with personal energy and life forces. Conscious energy and involuntary energy.
The strongest of these energies is sexual energy and the labeling of sexual preferences, fantasies and thoughts often creates much confusion.
Thoughts and fantasies can change, recur, renew etc., as time passes. Self images are created as a fit with what exists in any personal daily universe. The image is purposefully self created but does not always mesh with other involuntary thoughts and fantasies.
What to do? The excluded thoughts and images just don’t go away. It’s not that those thoughts and fantasies are dangerous, unlawful or harmful to self or others. It’s just that they don’t match the self image. So, quite often the thoughts and energies are buried in the back of the mind. But they don’t cease to exist.
Such burials can be a waste of energy and can distract from a peaceful and productive existence.
Tantric practice and massage can help to resurrect and find a useful place for such buried energy. It can find a map to hidden treasures – the acceptance of self, and greater peace of mind.
Tantric practice is about the conscious and enjoyable control of the energies that inevitably play in the mind and body. Always the most powerful and fascinating of those energies is sexual energy. It is disabling to deny that fact and enabling to control and enjoy it.
The suppression and pigeonholing of thoughts can be paralyzing. Tantric practice offers the chance to safely explore thoughts and fantasies and to include them in real life. To make them fit with self image.
To erase some of the useless labels. To learn to enjoy some fantasies and find some happy places.
Here’s a question that is often spoken – and often unspoken. ‘Is it OK to touch while receiving touch?’
The answer is to remember that the guiding principle in Tantric massage is to work toward total relaxation of the mind and body.
Massage can have the effect of seeming to magnify natural energy. As any massage progresses, and the mind starts to relax and wander, the body can energize, physically. It’s natural to want to reach out and transfer some of that energy. In doing so the energy delivered in the massage is further enhanced.
The fact is that energy is built as much by touching as by being touched. Receiving touch without the opportunity to appropriately respond can remove a critical part of the experiential potential.
Of course it is entirely acceptable and possible to enjoy a full body massage without exploring reciprocal touch. Tantric massage practice, however, is one of the few approaches that recognizes that complete relaxation can also include the engagement of our potential to distribute energy as well as receive it.
Happily, Tantric massage will always look to find the most complete opportunities for a relaxed state of mind and body.
Email: email@example.com or subscribe to this site.
This email has been on my list for inclusion for the past year. Now seems a good time to post it.
It’s an email from a reader who explains that after a year of regular relaxation massage he became increasingly motivated to improve his body image and state of mind. The content speaks for itself. I haven’t edited his remarks, which convey a sincere message.
He wonders whether his thoughts are ‘tantric enough’. I replied to him when he wrote, saying that his experiences were entirely reflective of Tantric possibilities.
Regaining a physical comfort level is very much a matter of continued realistic commitment and motivation.
Tantric practice can promote and combine a relaxed state of mind with a non-judgemental physical awareness, and can contribute to a progressive and lasting change in outlook and health.
Tantric practice makes no claims based on accepted scientific method but the following email does suggest that happy endings come in many disguises.
Subject: Massage for fitness
Hey Colin, You might like this for your web site.
Its the new year 2014 and I remembered my new year rezolutions a year ago. It was to lose some weight and try to get fitter.
I am a family man with grown kids out of the home and I had become a couch cabbage. I’d tried jogging and gyms and all sorts of things but nothing seemed to stick so I’d almost given up. I got talking to a casual friend who seemed in better shape than me and he said he’d been going for massage regularly for a couple of years and he’d found that it made him more active and also relaxed in himself at the same time.
I thought he might be joking with me like he was suggesting something wierd and he might be talking about ladies and happy endings but he wasn’t although he said so far the results had been happy.
He gave me the number of the guy that he’d been visitng for massage and I called it after feeling even more over stuffed from Christmas. I did mention my friend and that I was looking to get in better shape. It seemed a bit unlikely that massage could do what I wanted but my friend seemed to have become fitter and so maybe there was a secret. Also I was a bit nervous about getting massage from another guy but I was curious in my mind and I’ll admit to some mixed feelings.
Long story short I made an appointment and had a great complete massage. The masseur – I’ll skip his name – didn’t make the slightest personal remark although I told him that I was feeling overweight and tired. The time on the table was completely relaxing and I rebooked another visit.
I visited many times in the year and found that because I had to be undressed during the sessions which I began to enjoy I began to take more interest in my weight and as the sessions relaxed me I started to become more interested in diet and excercize.
I dropped more than 10 lbs. during the year. I think it was a result of the massage making me more conscious of myself and motivating me even though my massage buddy never made a remark. I get on well with him and I think I’ve found the same experience as my friend.
Not sure if this is tantric enough for you but it might also work for other guys who can’t find things that work. I won’t mention all of the massage techniques that I’ve enjoyed but they beat a lot of other excercize options. Also no problem with having a guy massaging me. I’ll just say that it’s really helped me relax and enjoy my curious side.
Ps: I’m in Calgary but expect to semi retire in a couple of years so maybe I’ll visit you.
New Year Resolution:
Make your Fantasies your Realities – It’s never too late!
Explore the pleasures of Mind and Body – and break all barriers of discrimination.