Massage, Touch, Tantra, Energy & Shared Awareness

Posts tagged ‘Human sexual activity’

More… ‘Dinner with Stephen’

MassageOilDinner with Stephen – continued

Too long ago I received long and descriptive accounts of the experiences of a man who had been able to explore his sexuality with the help of a new-found neighbor. He met his neighbor, Stephen, when he had recently moved into an apartment in the Toronto area.

I posted the accounts on this site some time ago. After posting he sent me descriptions of further encounters which I set aside for later inclusion. Although much delayed, and after a recent reminder, I have finally managed to return to what has been sitting in my inbox for a long time.

If you’ve missed the previous posts and contexts, they appear later in this site. In the meantime here’s the much delayed continuation. The account is long. The original was even longer!! I’ve ended this description approx. at the halfway point. He describes his meeting and the massage evening with Stephen’s male colleague, Jeffery, and female assistant, Julia.

Later – to be posted soon – he describes the massage experience and some of the Tantric energies and practices that combined with it. His descriptions are fun to read and it does remind that there are so many exciting and healthful benefits to the many and varied aspects of Tantric practice.

Here’s the account of the first part of his evening.



‘……………She said this felt good and from my view I watched Stephen’s cock and balls as he stood above us. The shampoo ended and Stephen slid back into the tub and Susan slid under the water, turning it soapy with the shampoo. Both Stephen and I could feel her sliding around between us and then she reappeared.

And there we sat, chest deep in soapy water.

We sat in this liquid silence for what seemed an eternity. But this wasn’t an awkward silence. It was a silence of perfect communication. There seemed to be a feeling of complete connectedness and of a trust only possible through the common physical experiences that we’d risked throughout the evening.

We stayed on into the early hours, enjoying our newly discovered comfort.

The time did end, of course, and reluctantly I dragged myself down the hallway to my own apartment. But the connections that we’d made were particularly strong and we all knew that this was not to be a ‘one night stand’.

This would not be our only encounter”………….’

close-breastsMy visits with Stephen had been nothing, if not intense. From his welcoming visit when I first moved in to the dinner down the hallway at his apartment, we had shared the most intimate of times even though we were initially strangers to each other.

After the dinner, where I was unexpectedly introduced to his friend, Susan, there was no longer any way that we could be described as ‘strangers’. I had experienced the most erotic and personal encounter of my life and could live happily ever after just on the memory, alone.

As Stephen and Susan had implied, the dinner experience was not to be a ‘one night stand’.

After that dinner, the next day as I left for work, I slipped a note of thanks under Stephen’s door, inviting him and Susan to dinner at my place in the near future.

I didn’t have to wait long for a reply. When I returned from work that evening I discovered a note from Stephen saying that he would love to visit. He said that Susan had called him to say that she’d had a wonderful time with both of us and looked forward to meeting up again when she returned from a month long business trip. So the next visit with Stephen would not include Susan, it seemed.

I called Stephen on his cell later that evening and invited him over at the weekend. The energy of the dinner encounter was still burning in me and I didn’t want to let too much time pass. To my relief Stephen said that he was free on the Saturday. He said he hoped that I wouldn’t mind but he had a couple of friends who would love to join us if I didn’t mind adding to the invite. He would explain more on Saturday and not to do anything elaborate for food. Just snacks and drinks would be fine. So we were set.

I cleaned up the living room and laid out a selection of snacks and bottles and at around 5.00 p.m. on Saturday Stephen knocked on my door. It had only been a week since I’d seen him and despite the fact that we’d enjoyed a seeming lifetime of intimacy in the very few weeks since we first met, I still felt a little nervous in his company. Maybe it was his self confidence or his knowing smile. I felt supremely comfortable in his company and also more than a little willing to follow wherever he led me. In other words my feelings were pleasantly mixed.

Anyway he entered as soon as I opened the door and gave me a lingering hug. Kicking off his shoes, he apologized for not bringing a gift and said that he assumed I would have as much as we needed and he hadn’t wanted to go to the store. I found myself thanking him for thinking of not buying anything. We noticed the absurdity of my thanks for nothing at the same time and that connection once again broke the ice.

We made our way into the living room and sat together on the couch.

discoveryA big part of our connection initially had been our shared interest in communal nudity and it had been my disclosure of my battles with self consciousness that had initially connected us. On Stephen’s first visit I’d shown him my rather unique personal tattoos and we’d moved ahead from there.

In anticipation of this evening I’d been thinking how to respect and continue our shared interest without seeming too forward. I was anticipating hearing about the guests he’d invited and thought I should wait for Stephen’s guidance before approaching the subject of whether we would be dining nude. At the same time I wanted to show him that I had been working on improving my personal comfort level with my tendency for self consciousness.

My compromise was to wear some old jeans – clean but ragged – and a casual shirt which was missing a few buttons. I hadn’t bothered with underwear or socks. I thought the appearance casual and appropriate, reflecting a willingness to show something of myself without being coy or entirely undressed.

Stephen was wearing a sports shirt and slacks. He’d removed his sneakers at the door and, as ever, hadn’t bothered with socks. Otherwise he certainly looked more smartly dressed and covered than me.

He put my mind at rest, joking and congratulating me on my open shirt and revealing rips on my jeans. The rips weren’t too strategic and one tear had expanded, during the wash cycle, around the top of my thigh, which would have revealed my underwear, had I been wearing any. I realized that in certain positions I would be quite exposed, particularly if aroused. This thought immediately created a condition of arousal!! And I shifted on the couch, for some reason seeking to hide my erection from Stephen. He saw my discomfort and commented with a smile, that he thought we could admit to being mutual voyeurs and exhibitionists by now. Of course I couldn’t disagree and adjusted my position to something more comfortable, albeit more revealing.

As we munched on cheese and chips Stephen told me about his guests, due to arrive later. Stephen works at a local hotel. He is friendly with the spa manage, Jeffery, it turned out. One of the perks of Stephen’s job is a membership of the gym, use of the spa and pool and the occasional massage when time permits.

He said that while spa massage etiquette is very strict – Jeffery is a professional personal trainer and masseur – in his off-duty time he likes to experiment with more ‘inventive or complete’ techniques. Stephen said also that Jeffery was training a new therapist – Julia. Jeffery wanted an opportunity to share with Julia some techniques and approaches that normally weren’t part of the spa’s menu.

Stephen had told Jeffery something of our shared interest in social nudity and suggested that Jeffery bring over his portable massage table to my place one evening and offer some ‘off the clock’ massage training to Julia. In exchange for my hospitality I would get a massage and meet some new friends. That was Stephen’s idea and he thought it unlikely that I would object. He said Jeffery would fill in more detail later. Was I OK with this?

I said that I sounded fine with me. If there was any problem we’d be able to discuss it with Jeffery later.

Stephen said that we could make room for the table set up before they arrived so we moved the coffee table and chairs so that there was room for the massage table to be set up.

chest-soakShortly after moving the furniture Jeffery and Julia buzzed the entrance intercom and made their way up to my apartment. I opened the front door and Stephen stepped into the hallway to direct them to my suite. Jeffery was carrying his folded table – looked like a large suitcase followed by Julia carrying a sports bag.

We showed them into the apartment and through to the living room and made the introductions. Jeffery was very much a ‘people person’. Quite athletic in appearance. Not tall. Late thirties. Blond hair and a comfortable face. He was wearing a blue tracksuit outfit with the logo of the hotel. Julia was possibly in her mid twenties. Brown long hair and also seemingly quite athletic. Also wearing the hotel tracksuit.

I invited them to sit down and then realized we’d moved all the furniture. So we moved the chairs and table back and laid out the snacks again, explaining that we wanted to make room for the massage table. This all broke the ice and we got to talking.

Jeffery repeated what Stephen had described, but in more detail. He said that while he enjoyed his job at the spa, where he’d been for some years, there were aspects of policy that didn’t always match with client expectations. In Julia’s training he wanted to show her how to comfortably deal with non-policy situations and what to expect etc. He’d be more specific, later. He also said that he shared Stephen’s interest in social nudity and shared sensual experience, and he understood that I also shared that interest. I said that he was correct and that Stephen had done much to improve my comfort levels in the short time that we’d known each other.

He invited Julia’s thoughts after his brief introduction. She said that she’d worked as a gym manager in another city. She’d left the position after wanting a significant change of scene and city. I suspected it might have something to do with a personal relationship situation and of course we didn’t want to ask for further explanation. She said that she was enjoying her time with the hotel and that she had found much in common with Jeffery’s outlook. She said that she also shared our comfort with social nudity and was very comfortable with all expressions of sexuality and orientation. She was looking forward to the evening and thanked me for inviting everybody.

Jeffery went on to say that his plan was to set up the table and if I was agreeable they would use me as a massage model so that he could demonstrate to Julia some of the techniques that he couldn’t present at the spa but that would be useful to her in her career. Also he said that he enjoyed practicing some techniques that weren’t available at the spa. The massage and touch could be more intimate and complete at times and he hoped that was OK with me.

I reassured him that it sounded fine and Stephen joked that I owed him something, now. Jeffery said that we would likely switch at some point so that Stephen could enjoy some table time as well.

All this sounded good and Jeffery suggested that we set up the table so we moved the furniture yet again. The table easily unfolded and Julia produced some sheets and oils etc. from her sports bag. Soon we were all set.

helping-handNow I began to feel the familiar nerves at the prospect of getting naked around others. I’d experienced the same thing when Stephen had first visited and then again initially at the dinner. Of course I’d become comfortable quite quickly but still I had to tell myself again that this wasn’t the time to be too self conscious.

Stephen quickly spotted my hesitation and immediately blew my cover. He joked that he’d discovered that I was a ‘slow starter’ when it came to undressing.

Before I could admit or deny, Jeffery said that it was entirely OK if I’d like them to use a sheet to cover me. They could just expose the parts that they were massaging. I quickly said that wouldn’t be necessary and I was inwardly kicking myself for falling again into the same hesitations.

Of course Stephen was enjoying his usual mischievous sense of humor and Jeffery saw that. I guess he’d learned Stephen’s personality in the course of their work at the hotel.

So Jeffery rescued me, asking if he and Julia could get ready now to begin the massage. I said that I was ready whenever they were. Jeffery said  that given our common interest and comfort with social nudity he’d be quite comfortable leading the massage naked if that was something we could all enjoy. I began to feel that I had unintentionally raised a non-existent issue and took the opportunity to say that I thought that would be a great idea.

With that Jeffery unzipped his tracksuit top, took it off and removed the singlet that he was wearing underneath. He was a good looking guy by any standard. Not overly developed but in good shape, reflecting his occupation. He bent down to remove his socks – he’d removed his sneakers when he arrived – and stepped out of his track suit pants. All that remained were his briefs and as he stood there I realized these weren’t the usual jockeys but were actually closer to female panties.

I didn’t get the impression this was a surprise to Stephen or Julia but clearly my gaze lingered longer than theirs. Jeffery was completely unfazed and said that he had always enjoyed the experience of some elements of cross dressing. He said it was his little harmless secret. That Stephen had told him of my tattoos which might be an equivalent sort of secret. That he was looking forward to seeing them for himself.

The panties barely contained his genitals and the outline of his cock showed that he was quite aroused.

Without much further delay he took off the panties revealing his fully erect cock. I always experience an incredible energy surge in these situations and this was no different. Jeffery looked like everybody’s dream for a personal trainer. His body was lean and smooth and his shaved genital region made his arousal looked so inviting. My own erection seemed to be struggling to fight its way out via the rip in my jeans.

shadowOf course Jeffery saw the effect he was having and said that he’d been looking forward to this evening and he hoped that it was OK to share this energy as openly as Stephen had suggested we could. As usual I burbled something about also looking forward to enjoying the time.  Jeffery said that he always wished the hotel spa would allow nudity in its facility but the rules were very strict.

He said that in massage situations and in the sauna people often became aroused and it was often tempting to assist them to enjoy the sexual energy. However, while never making them feel awkward he said that he used techniques to try to help them refocus. He wanted to show Julia some of these techniques so that she would be able to always be comfortable helping guests stay within the hotel spa rules. That was another reason why this evening would be interesting.

As he spoke his erection subsided but the charged energy in the room certainly remained.

Stephen and Julia had remained quiet during Jeffery’s undressing and comments. When he ended he turned to Julia and invited her thoughts pointing out to Stephen and me that they had been enjoying a good working relationship now, for a few months and had shared plenty of personal secrets including his cross dressing secret. He said that actually Julia had lent him the panties for tonight.

Julia nodded and joked that it seemed like he wouldn’t be needing them again at the moment. She said that this was also an exciting evening for her. Jeffery had described some of the ways that she could handle massage spa clients who were hoping for touch that the hotel didn’t permit. She said that it was quite a common situation and that there were ways to work around the issue while keeping the client friendly and wanting to return. She thanked me for volunteering to be a subject that she could practice on and she thanked Jeffery for being an understanding, if unconventional boss. She added that it was even more fun to be able to enjoy the practice, naked. With that she unzipped and discarded the tracksuit top revealing a black sports bra. As Jeffery had, she’d taken off her sneakers at the door so only had to remove her socks and drop the tracksuit pants. She looked a model of fitness, the sports bra matching the black bikini panties that she was wearing.

Again I was struggling to contain myself. Jeffery’s naked form was sufficiently stimulating, of course, and I could certainly experience the additional energy that Julia was contributing. Quickly enough Julia unhooked her bra and slipped off the briefs. Now naked, she was a great match for Jeffery. Clearly they were a credit to any sports spa. Julia was as well toned as Jeffery. Her breasts didn’t really need the support of any bra. I’d told Stephen previously that I’ve always had a fascination with breasts, both male and female and I noticed him smiling at me as Julia revealed herself. Julia’s breasts and nipples seemed like magnets to my eyes at the time.

Her entire body was perfectly proportioned and on the petite side. Like Jeffery – and Stephen and me, actually – her pubic area was shaved. I noticed that her labia were particularly visible and the energy seemed to say that she was very comfortable and happy with her body.

So that completed the disrobing of my guests and Stephen, who had remained uncharacteristically quiet, observed that maybe we were being a little slow in getting naked. That he had told Jeffery and Julia about my tattoos and he was sure they wanted to see them. Julia echoed this and said now was my time to ‘reveal all’.

discoveryI was still very much aroused and a little nervous but now was the time and I dropped my jeans and discarded the shirt almost in one movement. My cock popped up immediately and I absorbed the energy of the visual exploration of my now naked form. I was a little conscious that I could easily afford to lose a few pounds, comparing myself to the lean and athletic forms of Jeffery and Julia. The tattoo on my upper thigh was now clearly visible as was the unnamed creature tattooed on my chest, who spent his life gazing at my nipple.

 It was Julia who spoke, saying that she was looking forward to stroking these creatures in the massage. She looked at my erect penis. I knew that I was leaking at the tip and Julia wasn’t shy in noticing and commenting. She said that it was always gratifying to see evidence of appreciation. ‘Keep it up’ she said with a smile.

Stephen told her that she should look on my reverse side – the picture tattoo on my butt cheek. She and Jeffery moved behind me to take a look. Jeffery said that this had to be a uniquely artistic creation.

My erection was still maintaining as they came back to face me and I saw Stephen undressing behind them. As ever he looked a picture of comfort, his own arousal clear for us all to appreciate.

I was reminded a little of the energy that I’d experienced at dinner the previous week at Stephen’s when Susan had been with us. Julia’s energy seemed not unlike Susan’s although Susan is very much a ladies lady.

It also reminded me that since meeting Stephen I had been unbelievably fortunate in becoming part of a social lifestyle that enabled me to spend time with wonderful people who enjoyed being naked and open about their sexuality.

stimulateJeffery said it was now time to ‘get to work’ and that I should get onto the table. I climbed on, face down, adjusting my still erect cock between the table and my belly. I could feel the leaked pre-cum against my skin and tried to distract myself to avoid any premature ejaculation. It wasn’t going to be easy and I realized that Jeffery’s purpose was very much to assist Julia in learning techniques that would assist with these energies. I began to feel that I was also going to gain much benefit from Jeffery’s instruction to Julia. 

To be continued……………..


Phone: 250-984-7051



Couples & Massage

Couples & Tantra

Couples of all descriptions – opposite & same sex –  are more likely than ever before to participate in Tantric group workshops or enjoy massages together.

Even ‘up-market’ commercial spa businesses encourage couples to visit and enjoy massage together – but it’s not exactly Tantric. There will be strict rules and limits!!

Tantric massage, however, offers an opportunity to escape some of the limits and rules and, more completely, enjoy sharing the energy of guided touch – together.

It is interesting to consider some of the reasons for couples to enjoy massage experiences together.

In no particular order:

Looking to celebrate a partner’s birthday, anniversary or some other significant event. Shared massage can be a great way to celebrate. The goal can be to make a present of a sensual and relaxing massage.

 There are those who have been researching and practicing some Tantric ritual and massage themselves and have decided to take things a little further, as if it were a mini Tantric workshop, demonstrating how to enhance sensitivity, heighten awareness and progress Tantric ideas.

If these are categories of purpose then a third category would be those who mutually wish to enhance their personal activity but somehow find that they aren’t ‘connecting’ often enough.

The turn to Tantric practice and massage has been to move beyond talk to more of a practical and hands-on experience.

While Tantric practice makes no claim to scientific or licensed professional equivalency, there is much value in choosing and incorporating hands-on experience where the comfort level allows.

Sometimes couples seek an enhanced understanding of how to meet their partner’s expectations. Tantric practice and massage can demonstrate and practice, in a friendly, non threatening way, how the preferences of either partner can be met. And then practice makes perfect.

Other couples seek simply to explore, sensually, and wish to share their experiences.

Tantric practice is gender neutral, and most ideas and objectives are properly common to both sexes. Nonetheless there are obviously differences in techniques when moving males or females into the states of heightened awareness. Shared Tantric practice recognizes this and can contribute positively to individual experiences and energies.

There are all sorts of nuances and variations to these categories, of course, and Tantric practice seeks to enhance and enable those nuances.

In Tantra, so long as the intentions are clear and consensual, Tantric practice can offer much to any couple in maintaining the strength and excitement of the relationship.

So, if you read this as 50% of a couple and have always wondered how shared time works in Tantra and Tantric massage, feel most welcome and comfortable to call and talk about the possibilities. You’ll be in good company.


Tel: 250-984-7051                      Email:




Outcall Massage & A Birthday Party

There are occasions where an outcall visit can add to a special event, and I thought it worth describing such an event. It was to celebrate a birthday!

This was unusual in some ways but did remind of the Tantric possibilities of gathering a small group of people together.

Often it’s fun to invite a few people together at the same time. The presence of a small group will provide a different energy from that in individual sessions.

What follows is a more detailed description of the ‘birthday outcall’. I was happy to be part of the evening.

Just email or telephone with any questions.


Tel: 250-984-7051                Email:


Birthday Massage

I was recently invited to be part of a small birthday celebration at the home of some friends of mine.

It was the birthday of a friend of theirs and they wanted to organize a memorable, but ‘civilized’, party.

My friends have been Tantric visitors for a few years and I’ve known them through Tantra and various art gatherings, exhibitions etc. I wrote previously about a recent Performance Art gathering held at their place last year.

I thought a description of what they arranged for their friend was worth a few words since it was so carefully planned and worked so well. It also allowed me to describe some outcall possibilities.

Really the concept was quite simple. They invited their birthday friend (he’s unattached) and 2 other m/f couples, for a surprise birthday dinner. That made a party of seven. My friends are a same sex couple.

The surprise for the ‘birthday guest’ was to be that everybody would receive a massage throughout the evening – if they chose. I was invited to provide the massages.

What made the plan particularly interesting, and provided the ‘performance art’ aspect, was that the massage table was set up in the dining room. So while the others were eating, the guest receiving massage could be watched from the dining table.

My friends saw this not only as a birthday gift of Tantric massage, but also as performance art.

Initially the massage table was draped and disguised. When everybody was seated for dinner, and comfortable – there had been drinks etc. before sitting down – the hosts uncovered the massage table and announced the evening’s ‘birthday present’.

I had no doubt that the plan would be well received – all guests were on the same page. I did wonder how the logistics would work, however.

The initial surprise announcement was greeted with appreciation, laughter and enormous positive energy.

We were told that the order of massage would be random. Cards would be dealt to each person prior to each massage. The highest card would be the next massage.

Massages would last around 20 mins. and would be called with 10 minute breaks between people. Fresh sheets for each.

Then some of the obvious questions arose. The random playing card routine handled who would be first, but then questions about what to wear/not to wear/how intimate/oil etc. – all were asked.

Our hosts said that all that was necessary was for everyone to enjoy themselves within their own comfort level – obviously it was equally acceptable to take a pass and just watch.

My instruction was to massage entirely according to the wishes of the guest. Our hosts and the table would ensure that the guest was heard and understood.

The dress for the evening was smart/casual. The group comprised of very open minded people, of course, but it can never be assumed that all sizes always fit everybody, whatever the past experiences.

In this case everybody seemed totally into the activity.

So, as the party talked and decided I prepared the table, with a side table for oil, towels etc.

The cards were dealt for the first time, and turned up. The highest belonged to one of the partnered guys.

Our hosts had set a Chinese screen for changing and with the encouragement of all, especially his partner, the first ‘victim’ retired behind the screen to undress.

I knew there were towels behind the screen and the guest emerged from the screen, wearing one of them around his waist, to much applause.

He looked to be a fit guy. Mid 40’s, I guess. Nice guy.

He climbed onto the table, face down. Our hosts asked if he wanted to keep the towel on and of course the group encouraged him to discard it. That was his choice so I removed it.

I started the massage of his back immediately as the party enjoyed their meal and enjoyed the visual of the massage. I checked if it was OK to use oil. It was. The time allowed around 10 minutes work on each side.

Now the time came for him to turn over. Again the question – did he want a towel? Hoots of laughter from the table encouraging no towel! I whispered in his ear, checking his preference. Likely the diners had swallowed more wine at this stage.

The energy in the room was certainly erotic, so the towel was not required by him or the party!

The turn over revealed that he was clearly enjoying the time and he was cheered by the ‘audience’. I massaged his front for another 10 minutes or so, figuring that his partner or others could continue the massage themselves, at a later time, if that was the plan.

The front massage was over soon enough – too soon, probably for the guest – and he rolled off the table, standing to take a mock bow.

Our host then asked him whether he wanted to get dressed again or just recover the towel. I knew whatever he decided would set the precedent for the evening.

His partner called out that he should remain as he was – naked and well oiled. That received the support of the table, so I handed him the towel and he resumed his seat, a nude male at a table of smartly dressed diners. Performance art takes many forms.

New cards were dealt and this time the high card was the ‘birthday’ guest.  The timing seemed entirely appropriate.

I won’t describe the process again. I took a similar approach, as did he. We all sang happy birthday when he turned over. As with the previous guest, he didn’t recover his clothes, so the table now included two naked male guests.

The next card dealing only included the remaining five guests, of course. The high card fell to the female partner of the guy who hadn’t yet had a massage.

She was a fit looking blond wearing an informal short evening dress, matching shoes and bare legs.

Tantric massage is approached with respect and with a practical neutrality regarding gender. The experience can and should contain energy and potential, with proper regard for the wishes and preferences of any person as an individual.

Our host checked carefully that this was within the lady’s comfort level. Also that the consumption of wine wasn’t getting the better of anybody!

She reassured everybody that this was exactly where she wanted to be and emerged from her seat at the table. She didn’t bother with a trip behind the screen and simply slipped off her shoes and dress. There wasn’t anything else to remove. Much applause from the diners.

She climbed onto the massage table and I spent 10 mins. massaging her back. Then turn over time came. I whispered in her ear, asking if she wanted draping.

The reply was a very clear “no”, and she flipped over immediately. As with the previous massages I massaged her front, not avoiding any areas and not seeking to over stimulate. By the end of the massage she was as happy as her two previous companion diners.

On leaving the massage table she said she no longer has use for her dress that evening and joined the others at the table.

It happened that the next high card was also the remaining female guest and she followed the same easy pattern as the previous guest.

The remaining guests for massage were the guys, of course, and at the end the energy in the room by now was ‘electric’. I’d say that the ‘performance’ element had been well received!

Our hosts had taken pictures, with the permission of everybody, throughout the evening, and the final pictures, which featured the final guy, still dressed, at the table between six, now naked, people, made an interesting comparison with the first guy to be massaged, sitting naked among six clothed people.

Personally I’d enjoyed the experience. It was a long evening but the energy was so positive there was little time to have any thoughts of fatigue.

I’ve seen the pictures that were taken. I think they will be used in an exhibition in due course.

I’ve also been told that the guest of honour found this to be his best birthday present, ever!

I recount this to explain how Tantric approaches and experiences can be used to raise energy and heighten awareness in many situations. This was an event that wasn’t difficult to imagine or organize but led to an unforgettable experience for all present.

I’ve left out my own thinking throughout the evening. Email if you’re interested in my experience of the reactions of the guests, how I was asked to participate and appear, and how it affected me – or even if you have a birthday or any other celebration, coming up!!


Tel:  250-984-7051                    Email:












Becoming Comfortable – Naked

Becoming Comfortable – Naked

I received this message from a female artist and Tantrika and because she addresses questions that are often difficult to ask I thought it was well worth publishing here. Her thoughts and comments speak for themselves and reflect many of the ideas and practices that my own visitors enjoy and that I am pleased to encourage.

‘ Hello Colin,

I read as much as I can find about Tantric practice and as an artist combining performance art with Tantra your blog has me very interested.

I’m located in Toronto and am a bisexual Tantrika, photographer and performance artist. Your descriptions of performance art and Tantric gatherings are so close to my own objectives that I wanted to write and add some of my own ideas and experiences which might interest some of your other readers.

I have found in my practice that Tantra and art combine so perfectly. Visual arts, in whatever medium you choose, including photography, ideally should make a lasting impression on the mind. So to bring art and Tantra together is a most powerful tool. Tantra is about becoming conscious of the body and its energies and so I make my art around the body and its sensual energy.

As I take my massage and Tantra clients on journeys to discover their hidden energies I like to arrange performance art and modeling sessions as often as I can. These sessions become a way of opening minds even further but do raise questions.

My approach is not traditional. I’m trying to do something different from the normal artist/model posing session although there is nothing wrong with that.

In my performance art and Tantric approach I try to capture through photographs and paint and pencil media the individual and group energy of gatherings of people.

For my clients I invite them to come together as a group to be my subjects. I don’t seek a gender balance but usually the balance is 75/25 majority male. Usually I can bring 4 – 8 people.

I hold the sessions in my studio which I love. For me it’s a space of special creative energy. My objective is to encourage people to move beyond their comfort levels and try to capture the energy of that transition as they adapt to the challenges of accepting themselves outside of their normal interaction with the world and other people.

I ask people to arrive at close to the same time. Always they are or have been massage clients so they know me. I start by asking them all to undress exactly where they find themselves.

This is a real challenge for most people. They are in a space that they likely haven’t been previously and among people who they may not have ever met before, so to undress so publicly and suddenly is not what they expected and challenges their comfort levels.  At this moment I try to photograph to capture the reactions.

My purpose is completely to raise body consciousness and as people undress I say that we’re here to celebrate bodies, forms and energies and not to hide or conceal and that I want to capture that energy.

It doesn’t take long for everybody to get naked and I ask them to stand and look around and absorb the forms and energies. I am very explicit in my language and tell the men that it is OK to have erections and to be curious about other men and the women.

In my profession as a Tantrika I have had many conversations with men who would really like to enjoy their Tantric time with male as well as female energy but are so worried that this desire might mean that they are gay. I always say that this is not necessarily so, and is nothing negative anyway, but that all people can be attracted and enjoy the energy of both sexes, especially when considered in a Tantric spirit. I often perform massage with a male friend to ease the comfort level. We should not resist giving and taking pleasing sensual and sexual energy when we can. Personally I enjoy the energy and bodies of both men and women and I try to encourage others to also explore honestly their own desires. Many of my clients visit me as well as male Tantric practices and I think this is so healthy. Just enjoy.

For my art session now I will photograph and sketch, looking at the changes in faces and energies.

People soon begin to relax a little seeing that everybody is feeling the same nervousness. I try to encourage people to become conscious of their nudity and not to ignore it for it is the sensual energy that I’m seeking to capture explicitly. The men will often start to have erections and the women will also start to pay attention to others.

For me the fascination is to record the transition that brings in sexual energy. I try to encourage people to begin to explore their own bodies in the presence of the others and then to carefully and respectfully touch and explore the bodies of others. I say to be free to explore people of the same gender however anybody self identifies. Sometimes it will be the first time a male has touched another male in a sensual or sexual way. Sometimes it is the first time that a female has watched men enjoying each other in a sexual way.

This is always within the comfort levels of individuals and nobody is ever made to feel uncomfortable. Nearly always people stay and progress their interest and I’m able to capture so many aspects of this change of sexual consciousness.

As time moves on people become less inhibited and I am able to sketch and paint at a less frantic pace. I would say that so many things can happen at these sessions. I see men enjoying their own bodies and learning about the sensuality of other men. I see women enjoying the same without judging the men. Of course people are free to express themselves and I try to encourage those expressions. As a Tantrika I train that all parts of the body can be centres of sexual energy and as an artist I like to see those energy centres being enjoyed.

When I have described this to others they always imagine that this is like an orgy. It is not a crude orgy in that way but it is an orgy of art and energy and there is nothing wrong when people can enjoy and treat each other kindly in these ways.

For both men and women it is good to see how others can behave sexually and sensually and even artistically.

I am always discreet with the photographs and drawings and after these sessions I take the images that reflect the energy and make the art by joining the images to reflect the energy of the session.

I hope that this will be interesting to you and your readers.


The writer sent me a few images of her work. I thought it worth posting this message and description. The important thing, apart from the artistic approach, is her clear understanding of how Tantric approaches to sensual and sexual energy can quickly create such positive changes in thinking and approaches to sexuality.


Tel: 250-984-7051




Posing for Art – In Tantric Style

Posing for Art – in Tantric style

I received the following email from a reader in New York. It’s worth reading and she has permitted me to post it, albeit I’ve deleted her name for privacy reasons.

If you are an artist or photographer – hobby or professional – and would like to engage with a group, or solo, to push the envelope a little, and experience some Tantric energy in visual and artistic form, I’d be happy to arrange to host such sessions.

It’s an extension from the group sessions that we currently enjoy and is a great use of Tantric energy.

Participants don’t have to be Tantric visitors, so bring along any friends with an appreciation for the human form, an open mind and a desire to paint or sketch. Or just come by yourself.

Art is an excellent way to open the gates to Tantric experience without risk or judgment. It’s gender neutral open to male & female artists and male and female models.

Just call or email if you’d like to participate.


Subject: Your Blog
From: **********

Hello Colin,

You might not get many emails like this and you don’t know me but I’m a regular reader of your blog.

I might be an unusual reader because I’m a female artist and photographer. I live in New York.

I wanted to add my 2 cents to the subjects you’ve included in your blog and say that a lot of this turns out to be useful in helping me with my art.

Mostly my art is interpretation of the human form both male & female. I use everything from oil on canvass to watercolor to pen & ink. I also often use photographic images to combine. I also teach drawing and composition in private art classes. Please read on and don’t imagine this is a pitch to get you to include my pictures on your blog. Its not about that.

I’ve been a professional artist for many years and specialize in human figure work as its always appe3aled to me as offering the best chances to produce unique work. Every body is completely unique and ever changing and I like to capture those changes ‘in the moment’.

I have many artist friends who have the same experience as me when trying to find session models. Its not difficult to find female models to pose but not so in finding male models.

If its just me painting or a class its usually not easy to find a male who can pose, often nude, to suit the needs of the artists. I think the convention is that its easier for females to feel comfortable about posing than males. Also conventions in our modern society have te4nded to prefer to view the female form than the male, although I think some things are changing in regards to that statement.

Part of my difficulty might have been in my approach to what I want to portray and I’ll say how I’ve solved the problem, personally, although I know generally that I’m not alone whatever the artistic approach requires.

Early in my career I found that capturing the human form was mostly a very sterile experience especially considering the excitement that the human body can generate. Artists are usually so concentrated on their work that the actual energy of the subject often escapes. Apologies to the many who do capture the energy of their subject.

In classical works portraying nudes, the energy is often captured, somehow, and we find that shared between the sexes.

My purpose and enjoyment has been to specialize in capturing sexual energy and tension and that is not a sterile task. It means asking a model not just to pose but actually to allow themselves to be part of an energy and image that can be observed by an artist and transferred to a canvass.

That’s asking a lot of any model and particularly a male model. I’m asking someone to pose in a state of sexual awareness or arousal which is a difficult thing for many to imagine in the usual art studio atmosphere. Mostly in figure work we encourage artists and students to ignore the elephant in the room and certainly never to venture personal approval or comment about the model.

My solution to the problem occurred when I met a guy giving massage in tantric styles, mostly to other men. We got talking and I told him what I did and what the problems often were. What he told me was very similar to what’s in your blog which is that tantric experience seems to allow people to be able to get more enjoyment from the sensuality of their bodies and to enjoy themselves for longer. Also to be less inhibited without being antisocial.

I didn’t know much about tantric massage etc. but I asked the guy if he’d like to pose at a small class that I had coming up to see if his ideas worked.

He agreed and I held the session at my studio. I think there were 4 artists at different levels of skill or objective.

At the time I wanted to sketch and paint a male in a state of heightened arousal, combining the facial expression with the genital expression. I recall that was the objective of all of us to varying degrees.

My tantric friend said he understood what I intended and delivered beautifully. He was completely confident in himself and gave the room an energy which did seem to inspire the artists.

Since then I’ve been able to invite, through my friend, many of his clients, also to pose and we’ve been able to focus and capture so much of the human form, in my opinion, in unique ways.

I’ve also come to learn more about tantra and have actually posed for a few sessions myself.

I’d say to any of your tantric readers that this is a practical use of the energy and erotic control that can be learned and that appreciation of the human form is something that should be encouraged and that sexual energy can actually be seen and experienced through the brush and canvass where the artist and model can move themselves to the same wavelength.

I hope this is of interest to you.

By the way, I should mention that as a female artist, equally curious about the male form, and the female form, I enjoy working with both sexes.

My classes are often mixed gender, sometimes all male and sometimes all female. Whatever the mix I say the same thing, that the model is completely deserving of our deep respect and gratitude. Its not an easy thing to reach and maintain a state of arousal in a group of people.

To all participants I say that they will themselves likely experience a sexual energy and they should use that to encourage their work. Often these sessions have given artists a very different view of sexuality in art than conventional figure sessions.

We’ve encouraged requests and positive comments and at times have posed two models at the same time. We’ve created a studio atmosphere that encourages artist/model communication. Although the standard of work necessarily varies, none in the classes are there to judge. Personally I’ll help when I’m asked. The surprising thing for me is how uniquely inspired the finished pieces so often are. Also how much more comfortable everybody is able to become with their physical selves through such uninhibited artistic interaction.

To be able to absorb so closely aspects of the human body that are often only brushed over has been most exciting for me and others.

(Signature deleted)

Contact Colin:

 Email:            Tel: 250-984-7051


Tantra, Fetish & Kink

Tantric Fetish & Kink

Tantric massage is a way of connecting the body to the mind.

With the pace of life today often we find that we seem to have blocked consciousness of the pleasure of physical sensations. We can lose touch with ourselves as erotic beings.

Tantric massage and touch can re-awaken erotic consciousness and Tantra is entirely about heightening erotic physical and mental awareness.

Within the Tantric experience, massage perhaps has the broadest appeal, but the opportunity also exists to delve deeper into Tantric sensation potentials.

As the mind begins to make more space for sensual, erotic and sexual stimulation, and as mental and physical awareness is heightened, the imagination of the erotic begins to challenge the physical body. We start to think about making fantasy a reality.

In Tantra it is possible to raise the sensitivity and expand the erogenous zones of the body.

Over time the body and mind becomes more conscious of erotic potential and the imagination begins to expand horizons. More fantasy can enter the consciousness door thatTantra has opened, allowing room to actualize fantasies.

Actualization of erotic imagery is often described, sometimes quite dismissively, as ‘kinky’ or ‘fetish’. But imagination should not be dismissed so easily.

Kinks and fetishes are entirely Tantric and are as valuable and valid as any part of erotic imagination.

Often Tantric visitors are hesitant to mention particular ‘turn-ons’, thinking that their thoughts are outside of proper Tantric conduct. I can reassure that actualization of erotic imagery, however ‘kinky’ or ‘fetish, it might seem (with the obvious exceptions of activity that is not lawful, sane, safe or consensual) is welcomed in Tantra and is regarded as the positive product of sensual and erotic imagination.

In my time I have been fortunate enough to share the ‘kink’ experiences and preferences of many Tantric visitors. Often a partner is needed to assist with and provide the stimulation. A Tantric guide is the ideal partner. Not only does Tantra not ‘judge’ but actually encourages and seeks to enhance such sexual and sensual ideas and experiences.

In the next posting I’ve listed some of the activities and ideas that have been shared. I’ve been pleased to have been asked to help turn some fantasies into realities. The list is certainly incomplete and if you have thoughts and ideas that you’d like to try, just let me know.

To all who enjoy the world of Tantra and massage, if you also enjoy other erotic activities or have thought about actualizing fantasies but are hesitant to mention, feel more than welcome to imagine fitting your ‘kink’ into some Tantric time. It would be wonderful to share your erotic imagination.


Tel: 250-984-7051                      Email:



Protected: Pick Your Poison

This content is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

Tag Cloud

%d bloggers like this: