Pick Your Poison
These remarks perhaps move outside the conventional Tantric definitions but are nonetheless relevant when considering how to enjoy a maximum of erotic stimulation.
Tantric massage, in its simplest forms, provides incredible sensual stimulation but isn’t always available. There are other options, however, that can fill the gaps in between massages, and even become a ‘way of life’ in themselves.
Heightened sensual awareness and erotic stimulation can become a 24/7 experience, constructively blended with regular day to day activity.
It’s just a question of allowing imagination to do its work and not being afraid to actualize and experiment.
While I make no claims to be much more than a messenger I can mention some of the ideas and practices that have been presented to me, over time, and try to point out the underlying reasons for the pleasure that can be obtained.
I’m not proposing to be an advocate for any of the ‘kinks’ or ‘fetishes’ mentioned. Some may appeal to you and others not. The trick is to remember that there are many ways to experience the sensual potential common to all. Just ‘pick your poison’!
To start with, begin to think about what heightens your sensual awareness when you’re alone. Self touch and masturbation is enjoyed by most people but is often approached with little conscious awareness.
Conscious self touch, or ‘mindful masturbation’ is a gateway to exploring a much broader potential. Many people work to lengthen and elaborate their solo experiences.
This is a true beginning. I won’t get into the techniques that can be used to this end – I plan a more detailed article soon – but broadly, start to be conscious of sensual self touch beyond simple genital stimulation.
Spend time on as many body zones that you can reach. Where reach is limited, use and invent ‘props’ to make the contact.
Allow yourself to mentally associate such ‘distant’ touch with genital stimulation. Very easily it will be possible to find that touch to an unrelated body region will result in deep sensual stimulation. Take your time.
This is the beginning of heightened sensory awareness.
An easy example might be sensations to the feet. We tend to ignore the foot as an erogenous zone, often because convention and practicalities don’t provide much opportunity to use the erotic potential of the foot.
Take every opportunity to be barefoot. Wear shoes that can be slipped off easily and don’t wear socks. You’ll always be aware that you can heighten your erotic sensitivity whenever you slip off your shoes.
As you sit at tables use the opportunity to stimulate the feet on the carpet or floor, discreetly. If you’ve been able to previously practice associating genital stimulation with foot stimulation it will soon be possible to raise sensual awareness in ordinary situations without moving immediately to the crotch!
Often you’ll also find like-minded people, if you relax and use some discretion, who understand the energy that you’re sending out.
This is obviously a very simple example – socially safe but full of opportunity. Practice can lead to foot fetishes of all forms – and so can begin a lifestyle.
The same ideas can apply to all other parts of the body – some easier to engage socially than others.
There’s nothing particularly new in discussing these ideas but often the erotic connection is not made when we seek to enjoy or enhance our bodies.
For instance is jewelry worn to please the wearer or the observer? How personal should and can jewelry be?
Earrings are a common place adornment, and unremarkable, but we’ve begun to explore further, the purpose and intent of body piercing. We’ve moved toward understanding that piercings and jewelry have a clear erotic purpose for the wearer which can be even more pleasurable for the wearer than the observer.
And we’ve made piercings very much more visible on body parts that used to be considered too personal to expose.
Tongue and navel piercings are now commonplace and highly visible. It’s possible to practice to associate these areas with erotic self stimulation. Genital piercings and jewelry for males and females are less obvious but are a constant physical stimulation which can be converted into erotic stimulation 24/7. The feel of steel in and against skin and flesh is one of the most erotic stimulants known to many people.
Nipple piercings are finding a less discreet place in the world of erotic experience.
The male nipple, which carries less social and sexual baggage than the female nipple, is a centre of nerve endings that can easily be developed as a fast track connection to erotic heightened awareness.
Even for those who do not find their nipples particularly sensitive to erotic touch and stimulation, with some practice it becomes very possible to use the nipple as a primary erogenous zone. Some shirt fabrics can stimulate the nipple very effectively at every movement, again providing sustained erotic energy.
It’s easy to understand how constant engagement and attention to these body parts can be considered ‘kinky’ or ‘fetish’. But that is not a reason to deny the sensual and sexual potential. It’s a way of opening the energy of the mind and body to its full potential.
Moving to a bigger canvass, the nude human body can be the most powerful initial stimulant.
Unfortunately our society makes it very difficult to enjoy the sensual and sexual potential energy of a naked form, either solo or in company.
We’re exposed to nudity in advertising all the time but this is one of the instances where it’s implied ‘don’t try this at home’. It’s suggested that we may not measure up to the airbrushed magazine images, or that we should confine ourselves to a life which finds fault with enjoying even our own bodies.
But we know that it can be stimulating and erotic to be naked, especially among others, and to see others naked.
To a greater or lesser extent we’re all potential voyeurs or exhibitionists.
Communal nakedness is enjoyed by nudist clubs etc. but these organizations often deny the sexual potential of what they enjoy. This may be appropriate within family environments but here we’re talking about adult potentials.
Many kink and fetish environments allow and encourage nudity for entirely erotic, sensual and sexual potentials.
To enjoy the feeling of exposing one’s body, complete with the unhidden sexual energy of piercings, make-up, jewelry etc., or entirely unadorned, to others, is a powerful statement and invitation to understand that it’s good to be aware of and in control of the physical body. That it’s good to demonstrate physically what is going on mentally.
Taken as a lifestyle interest, solo and communal nudity is again a ‘fetish’ that is positive and can live in the mind 24/7.
As the physical and mental connections are developed and become part of life, rather than simply reserved for ‘special occasions’, so it becomes increasingly possible to test boundaries and try experiences that at one time seemed too strange.
Now it is possible to be in environments where everybody can be understood as simply enjoying erotic stimulation for its own relaxation and erotic effects. That there is no ‘audience’ necessary. The activities are for the satisfaction of the individual. For those who are curious to watch, with permission, that is usually just fine. But the activities are part of the raising of erotic energy in ways that people have come to enjoy, often as a major component of their daily lives.
Perhaps the primary message is to welcome and encourage your fantasy. There is much energy to be found in dungeon play, BDSM, communal nudity, cross dressing, oil wrestling, tattoos, piercings, foot worship, mindful solo masturbation, communal masturbation, performance art, naked ritual etc. The possibilities are endless, limited only by imagination.
Here I’ve listed a few unconnected activities, entirely at random. There is no order of importance and the only thing the topics have in common is that they are enjoyed by many people who have found excellent outlets for their fantasy and sexual expression. It’s all worth exploring.
So, ‘fetishes and kinks’ are positive possibilities. It’s possible to enjoy many or just a few but practice does offer the chance to enhance and enjoy erotic energy when the massage table isn’t available.
I’m often asked to share in kinky and fetish fantasies as part of encouraging sexual and sensual energy and I am only too pleased to assist where I can, and to enjoy the experiences.
In Tantric group sessions we often talk about and explore such ideas and I’ve found so many new possibilities are opened in this way.
Always feel welcome to email or call on this general topic and let me know if you’d like to share or try something at a session.
The plan is always to encourage sensual and sexual awareness and to use this raised consciousness to enjoy all aspects of sexual life.
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