Massage, Touch, Tantra, Energy & Shared Awareness

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headsupPosts now exceed the capacity of a single page, so all posts can now be easily accessed by selecting from the titles listed in the column ‘ Recent Posts’ and in the title tab – ‘More Posts’. For protected posts, email for access codes. Thanks for reading.

Colin

TouchIn a quiet, warm room, your massage is enhanced with a full body, hot towel table bath, warm oil, shower and complete relaxation.

Shower and all facilities are available and sessions are untimed – stay as long as your schedule allows. Massage is always slow and relaxing. Simply an exchange and flow of positive energy.

This is a space to safely explore imagination.  All orientations, adult ages and genders are welcome.

Location and parking is easy and safe.

Within this blog are more detailed descriptions of the possibilities of Tantric Massage. Many postings – but not all  –  require a password to read, so do scroll to the end. Simply email the title to co.lins@outlook.com and I’ll send the password. Your curiosity is welcome.

Contact Colin at: 250-984-7051 or email: co.lins@outlook.com

Tantric massage is a conscious, sensual,  full body experience.

It’s a flow of positive energy enjoyed in a warm and safe environment.

It’s a space where the clock and the phone can be turned off. Where the shower can be long. Where the direction is relaxed, genuine and personal.

This is unrushed time that allows a slow and mindful experience of heightened awareness. It’s time away from reality where relaxation and re-discovery are possible.

To find out more  please do read further in the blog and call or email.

Tel: 250-984-7051 or email: co.lins@outlook.com

Colin 

The Erogenous Zone

The Erogenous Zone

Tantric massage is much more than simply physical massage.

Genuinely delivered, the massage experience can touch the mind as much as the body.

There are many posts in this blog which describe aspects of Tantric practice but perhaps the simplest explanation of Tantra touches on the pleasant distribution of the potential energy contained in the mind and body.

For those exploring Tantric massage there is an experience of mental and physical relaxation. It’s possible to simply submit to the relief and energy movement that full body Tantric touch brings, allowing the mind and body to wander.

Properly performed, Tantric massage is an open ended, timeless experience, raising the conscious and subconscious sensual potential of the entire being.

There is nothing wrong and everything right about enabling and allowing such experience.

But Tantra can take us even further into the land of sensuality.

Much of our potential energy begins in our mind. Our imagination is the beginning and the motivation for every experience that we create for ourselves. Tantric practice can help free our mind and enable us to enjoy, further, the sexual energy that we often bury within ourselves.

The point here is that there is more than one way to enjoy Tantric time and massage. Either passively, which can be wonderfully relaxing, or actively, where we consciously engage and stimulate our imagination as well as our physical being.

It’s the active option that is the subject of this note.

It’s no secret that the human body enjoys the sensation of friendly touch.  In exploring Tantra we look to enhance the way that we experience touch. We know that passively enjoying touch to the obvious and normally sensitive body regions will provide sexual and sensual stimulation, and we can enjoy these sensations without thought or effort.

But the body has the potential to develop many more erogenous zones than simply the obvious ones.

This is where imaginative energy and conscious and heightened awareness can serve us.

By deliberately becoming mindful about the touch being received we can discover that the entire body is a potential erogenous and erotic zone. This discovery and practice can have fundamental impacts on day to day life.

The mind can connect with the energies of the impulses of the physical body more readily, and the imagination can be controlled and directed positively and holistically.

Our imagination can begin to associate our personal space and environment more closely with the potential for positive physical and mental experience.

We can find positive potential in experiences that formally we may have ignored or found potentially negative. We can begin to find value in sights and feelings that appeared neutral or negative in the past.

The most powerful energy force within us is sexual energy and thus Tantra, with its emphasis on mindful sensuality, is the ideal route to opening the mind and expanding sexual imagination.

So, when you decide to treat yourself to a sensual Tantric massage, it’s entirely possible to take from the experience, not only some time of physical relaxation, but also the beginnings of a pleasant and permanent change in mental and physical consciousness.

In other words the experience does not have to end at the door on the way out.

Colin

Tel:  250-984-7051                             Email: co.lins@outlook.com

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The Tantric Tongue

A Tantric energy that often lies dormant and unexplored is the energy of the tongue.

In Tantra we seek to explore and heighten our experience of every sense and every part of our being. Yet somehow the potential of the tongue is often undervalued. So here are a few thoughts to whet your appetite.

We know that Tantric massage allows us to submit to and enjoy the energy of touch via hands, feet and body contact. Tantra also invites the Tantric touch sensation via the tongue. The experience to both a giver and receiver of the tip of the tongue lightly touching the skin is a unique path to mindful massage.

Now, here we are not especially considering the possibilities of conventional oral sexual activity. We’re looking deeper into the erotic and tantric possibilities of including Tantric touch via the tongue.

Around the world there are many cities that feature restaurants that provide the opportunity to eat from the naked body. Often sushi and desserts are presented not on a plate but on a nude body – much more fun than a silver platter – to be removed with chopsticks or similar devices.

The idea has also been incorporated into erotic events and performance art shows.

Tantric practice takes the concept further. Tantra seeks to fulfill the energy potential of each of five senses and that includes our sense of taste. Stimulation of the erotic potential of taste can be progressed and heightened with the placement of food on the naked body and thereafter eating from this ‘plate’. If the food is carefully placed it will be necessary to use the tongue and mouth very delicately in order to properly enjoy the feast – and of course there is no cutlery! Control is entirely with the tongue.

When incorporated into a Tantric experience a further energy dimension is opened. The experience has the added benefit for the Tantric explorer of heightening awareness both as an active and passive participant.

To eat in this way from another’s body is itself a highly charged and erotic experience. It not only excites the taste buds. When the tongue touches the body and transfers energy it also allows the careful and unusual consideration of the detail of the features, places and spaces of the body that we often hide. Carefully using the tongue to move and consume food around erogenous zones is a skill in itself. Similarly in the choice and placement of the food.

To experience being the ‘plate’ is the equally stimulating counter to being the ‘eater’. As food is removed and the body touched by the tongue in the process, a pleasurable heightened physical awareness is inevitable.

In preparation for any of these Tantric experiences the body is carefully washed, the choice of food and drink having been made beforehand. The body is often spread with an edible base – possibly butter or cream – to help fix some food in place and to allow the tongue to wander and experience the energy of taste.

Tantra is about building energy, heightening awareness and mindfully enjoying physical sensation in ways that relax both mentally and physically. This use of our sense of taste rewards these Tantric objectives in particularly unique ways.

The experience also reveals, often, new dimensions to the body ‘seen & understood’ only through our sense of taste and the oft underestimated tongue.

This brief description speaks to those some way along the Tantric path and I am always more than happy to expand further on the topic for those intrigued or interested. Just call or email.

Colin

Tel: (250) 984-7051

Email: co.lins@outlook.com

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Open Reply to Protected Ritual Post

It was kind of my visitor to allow his very descriptive email to be posted on this blog and at his request I did add a password to access the text. (With his permission I’ve removed the password, now and his email follows in the next post)

While I have replied to him privately he does raise some interesting and exciting issues which are worth some further thought.

His email describes an experience he had where he was introduced to a group of individuals who follow a Tantric lifestyle. The group was organized by a Tantric guide whom he visits for massage.

In his message he describes in much detail the introduction ceremony and ritual that was practiced to initiate him into the group and he asks whether what he experienced was common to all Tantric practice.

It’s worth noting that he expressed no negative thoughts and was simply seeking further information. Since I know him personally I know his questions to be sincere and his descriptions to be accurate.

In considering his questions it’s worth making a distinction between Tantric massage and Tantric practice in general. In this blog I’ve discussed many aspects of Tantric massage but the email talks about ritual and ceremony so I’ll set aside the massage element in this response and primarily talk about Tantric ritual and lifestyle.

Tantric practice is always about understanding the distribution of physical and intellectual energy in ourselves and others. Particularly sexual energy, which can be the most powerful force within us.

Any ceremony or ritual that recognizes these dynamics and moves participants comfortably, progressing them in adjusting and raising their awareness, is a valid presentation of Tantric practice.

The email describes a small group where two people are introduced to others further along the path, in a process designed to raise Tantric consciousness. The ceremony seems relatively simple and was clearly designed to consciously raise sensual and sexual energy and to provide an early step in opening minds and reducing inhibitions.

The form of ritual and wording described is quite common in Tantric practice and honours the participants as valued individuals and in every aspect of their beings.

There are more elaborate rituals than the one described and as this group moves on to further Tantric understandings it is likely that the ceremonies will require increasing intensity of thought and action as consciousness is continually raised.

Tantric ritual and practice is definitely not intended to be ‘secret’ or exclusive. The strength is to open minds and bodies to healthy understanding of the energies within us and to enjoy those energies in day to day life.

To be successful and take full advantage of the opportunities, stages of practice are introduced so that the process does not become overwhelming.

Many writings and rituals on this subject are available. I will make some chapters available describing how solo and group Tantric practice can be approached and successfully enjoyed. I’ll make them available through this blog whenever requested.

My friend’s experience seems entirely Tantric in its intent and practice and I’ve wished him well in the next stages. It does appear that he is in the hands of a practiced Tantric guide. I’ve asked him to send any further ceremony descriptions if he’d like to.

For those readers who find this topic interesting and would like to share experiences, questions or ideas, please do feel welcome to write to me, always in confidence of course.

Colin

Tel: 250-984-7051       Email: co.lins@outlook.com

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Tantric Ritual Experience

Subject: tantra group
From:@gmail.com

Its Ed here from Toronto.

I thought you would be interested to hear how my Tantric ritual encounter group went and compared with other groups that I havent been able to come to.

I told you before about the guy that Ive been getting massage from near me. He also has workshop groups which take people through stages of tantra massage etc. His ideas seem very like yours and so we got talking and I went to one of his group sessions. He’d told me that there was one other client of his at the same stage as me so we could be introduced together.

My description might be on the long side but I’m really interested to hear if it matches what you do.

I arrived at Petes place at the same time as the other guy whose name was Brian. Pete and 3 other guys and a female whose name was Dawn were there, so there were 7 of us.

Pete had put on some snacks etc. and made the room comfortable with a tantric altar, drapes and candles.

I can’t remember everyones names except Brian and Dawn but we were introduced. I was quite nervous not knowing how this was going to work out and I think Brian was as well. Pete and the others were dressed very loosely in what looked like silk pajamas. Brian and I were dressed in street clothes like slacks and shirts.They were all very nice to us. It seemed one of the guys was partnered with Dawn but they all obviously knew each other and were very relaxed. I guess theyd been there awhile before we arrived.

Pete had turned off most room lights and lit the candles. The mood in the room was friendly and positive so my nerves were beginning to relax.

Pete then took us through many of the concepts of tantra – energy, chakras etc. It was all what we’ve talked about but was worth rehearing as it always is. Then he welcomed me and Brian and said that the time of the evening was to introduce us to another level of tantrra beyond massage and that what we would experience would raise our knowledge of ourselves and make us more conscious of mental and physical pleasure.

I remember him saying that at first we might find the experience awkward but if we gave ourselves over to it we’d enjoy longlasting rewards and that tantra would open out minds and make us more conscious of sensual touch etc.

Brian and I were given pajamas like the others were wearing and sent to the bathroom together to change. Pete said to just wear the outfits and nothing else. It seemed a bit strange changing in the bathroom with a guy I’d never met before but he was a nice guy and I think he was thinking mostly about all this the same as me. We knew Pete from massage sessions and that he was totally sincere so no problem.

The pajamas were silk or something similar and felt comfortable and we went back into the room. Pete had put a low covered platform in front of the couch where the others were sitting. It might have been a low coffee table or something similar covered by a colored drape or cloth. Might have been 12″ above the floor and we were instructed the stand together facing the others on the table platform.

We stepped up and stood facing the others and Pete was to the side. In the background was chanting music and that with the candle light gave the place an exciting feel.

Pete then quietly announced that we were gathered to offer thanks for the chance to present ourselves in a safe and honoured way and to experience the energy trapped within us and to let loose that energy under our own conscious control. It was something like that and I can’t remember exactly. You might know better the wording or idea.

More words followed as we stood there and then we were told that our bodies and minds were to be honoured tonight in tantric open ritual and in offering ourselves as vulnerable we would move toward a better control of our own consciousness. As he talked Pete moved toward us and asked us to unbutton and remove the pajamas.

We followed his request, rather clumsily I felt, and then continued standing nude on the platform. I wasn’t sure where to look or whether to make eye contact with the others.

Pete then moved me closer to Brian and with a strap of some sort joined my right ankle to his left and my right wrist to his left wrist. I could feel his body heat at the points where our legs and arms touched. The straps were not tight or uncomfortable but joined us in an interesting way.

Then he put a fabric belt of some sort around my waist and with another loose strap attached my left wrist to the belt. So I could move my hand and arm at my side but not to the front or back. Same with Brian right arm.

The straps had distracted me for a moment from reminding myself that I was naked and as I again became conscious of that Pete came with a blindfold and covered my eyes and Brian’s.

More words from Pete who said that now our ‘companions’ as he called them would engage tantric ritual in recognizing the sacred bodies of Ed and Brian in part and in whole.

I won’t describe the whole thing but will mention the format which was repeated many times.

I could sense one person rose from the couch and came to the platform. We know who it was by voice alone. In the first experience the person came to the platform, probably knelt and placed his hands on my feet and said that he honoured Eds feet and gave thanks for sharing them with the group. He did the same with Brian. I felt the warm sensation of his hands stroking my feet and I felt that his hands were coated in what was likely a massage oil which transferred to my feet. At the time that he rubbed in the oil he said that the oil would annoint and raise a tantric energy.

I could feel myself becoming hard for the foot rub was very sensual. Because my wrists were strapped I couldn’t reach to cover my self or check anything and now I realised part of the point of the straps.

The person seemed to step back and sat down after making the same offerings to Brian.

I remember the next to attend was Dawn. She recited the same words as previously, this time honouring my legs, and Brian’s after, and thanking us for sharing ourselves. Her hands were covered in warm oil and she spread the oil on each leg up to the knee and sat down.

Again the sensation was so intense and I knew I was very hard. It wasn’t just the touch but the knowledge that all was being observed and I began to find myself thinking beyond the physical sensation since I could not touch my self.

Next somebody arose to recognize my thighs and annoint, always with the same form of words, gently and respectfully spoken. I remember this being the first time of any touch close to my genital region and I began to anticipate the possibility of annointing my genital region and thinking that likely wouild not happen. But it did, after the thighs.

The companion spoke the words honouring my scrotum and testicles and he used those actual words and annointed with more oil. The same for Brian, I could hear.

I wasn’t sure what to expect next and it was Dawn who came forward. She used the now familiar words honouring my penis and the expression of liquid energy it was presenting. I could sense that she must be looking at some precum. From massage exercizes I had been practicing controlling ejaculation and this was the time to control. I remeber breathing deeply as Dawn annointed me with oil and touched the now very moist tip and glans of my penis.

Although Dawn was female it was clear throughout that gender had little to do with tantric sexuality. It could just as well have been one of the guys annointing my penis. The ritual was about how Brian and I experienced the time and not who was providing the experience or their gender.

Later I talked to Dawn about this. I asked her if she had particularly chosen to honour our penises. She said that she had and that she felt that penisies should be enjoyed and offered by and to all genders and that in tantra we should learn that sensuality is independent of gender. Her question was, if tantra was to be useful in raising consciousness then that consciousness should be available to everyone in tantra. She remembered her own experience being moved in a group session like this, She said that the companions were all gay men and that they honoured her in exactly the same way as they would a guy.

With the same directness she said that the experience was just as erotic and sensual for her and so her own genital regions had become just as wet as the tip of any penis.  The thing for her was always to enjoy bodies whoever they belonged to.

We continued in this fashion which included my anus, stomach, nipples, neck, face, arms and various other bodyparts and regions.

Each touch became more and more intense. At the end of what must have lasted nearly an hour I was covered in oil and sweat as was my new companion, Brian.

We could feel each others exhaustion as Pete gave thanks for our energy and physical and mental beings. He then undid the straps and removed the blindfolds.

Immediately we saw that our tantric companions were now naked themselves.

In front of them were drapes laid out on the floor. Pete asked Brian and I to stretch out on the floor which we gratefully did after standing for nearly an hour. Then bowels of warm water were produced and we were washed by all four companions with some sort of herbal soap from head to toe.

After being dried the end of the ritual seemed to be approaching.

Pete recited that we were all now companions on the tantric path, conscious of our physical and mental energies and in control of our sensuality.

To demonstrate this control and shared path we were invited to join in a tantric hug as Pete called it. In group hugs, he said sexual energy was discounted. In a tantric hug, as in tantra, the object is to reciognize and enjoy sexual energy. To close the ritual we should allow ourselves to release the energy generated in this ritual evening and share that energy with our companions.

With that Pete embraced us all and gently reached for the closest erect penis. We followed his lead and assisted our companions in mutual masturbation. What happened was that we all fell to the floor and allowed whoever was nearest to work on us until each had ejaculated. We became an incredible, sweaty, sticky mess of flesh and at the end I can say that I’ve never felt so relaxed and empowered and this experience stays with me even now.

Next time I will be honoring another new companion. After we got cleaned up, in talking in Petes studio I discovered just how connected tantric practice can make people who have shared and deliberately presented to others what is unfortunately usually kept too personal.

Thats my account, which could go on longer but I’d be really interested in how close this is to your group sessions and tantric ritual.

I’ll call when I get into town.

Thanks Colin.

Ed

Pick Your Poison

These remarks perhaps move outside the conventional Tantric definitions but are nonetheless relevant when considering how to enjoy a maximum of erotic stimulation.

Tantric massage, in its simplest forms, provides incredible sensual stimulation but isn’t always available. There are other options, however, that can fill the gaps in between massages, and even become a ‘way of life’ in themselves.

Heightened sensual awareness and erotic stimulation can become a 24/7 experience, constructively blended with regular day to day activity.

It’s just a question of allowing imagination to do its work and not being afraid to actualize and experiment.

While I make no claims to be much more than a messenger I can mention some of the ideas and practices that have been presented to me, over time, and try to point out the underlying reasons for the pleasure that can be obtained.

I’m not proposing to be an advocate for any of the ‘kinks’ or ‘fetishes’ mentioned. Some may appeal to you and others not. The trick is to remember that there are many ways to experience the sensual potential common to all. Just ‘pick your poison’!

To start with, begin to think about what heightens your sensual awareness when you’re alone. Self touch and masturbation is enjoyed by most people but is often approached with little conscious awareness.

Conscious self touch, or ‘mindful masturbation’ is a gateway to exploring a much broader potential. Many people work to lengthen and elaborate their solo experiences.

This is a true beginning. I won’t get into the techniques that can be used to this end – I plan a more detailed article soon – but broadly, start to be conscious of sensual self touch beyond simple genital stimulation.

Spend time on as many body zones that you can reach. Where reach is limited, use and invent ‘props’ to make the contact.

Allow yourself to mentally associate such ‘distant’ touch with genital stimulation. Very easily it will be possible to find that touch to an unrelated body region will result in deep sensual stimulation. Take your time.

This is the beginning of heightened sensory awareness.

An easy example might be sensations to the feet. We tend to ignore the foot as an erogenous zone, often because convention and practicalities don’t provide much opportunity to use the erotic potential of the foot.

Take every opportunity to be barefoot. Wear shoes that can be slipped off easily and don’t wear socks. You’ll always be aware that you can heighten your erotic sensitivity whenever you slip off your shoes.

As you sit at tables use the opportunity to stimulate the feet on the carpet or floor, discreetly. If you’ve been able to previously practice associating genital stimulation with foot stimulation it will soon be possible to raise sensual awareness in ordinary situations without moving immediately to the crotch!

Often you’ll also find like-minded people, if you relax and use some discretion, who understand the energy that you’re sending out.

This is obviously a very simple example – socially safe but full of opportunity. Practice can lead to foot fetishes of all forms – and so can begin a lifestyle.

The same ideas can apply to all other parts of the body – some easier to engage socially than others.

There’s nothing particularly new in discussing these ideas but often the erotic connection is not made when we seek to enjoy or enhance our bodies.

For instance is jewelry worn to please the wearer or the observer? How personal should and can jewelry be?

Earrings are a common place adornment, and unremarkable, but we’ve begun to explore further, the purpose and intent of body piercing. We’ve moved toward understanding that piercings and jewelry have a clear erotic purpose for the wearer which can be even more pleasurable for the wearer than the observer.

And we’ve made piercings very much more visible on body parts that used to be considered too personal to expose.

Tongue and navel piercings are now commonplace and highly visible. It’s possible to practice to associate these areas with erotic self stimulation. Genital piercings and jewelry for males and females are less obvious but are a constant physical stimulation which can be converted into erotic stimulation 24/7. The feel of steel in and against skin and flesh is one of the most erotic stimulants known to many people.

Nipple piercings are finding a less discreet place in the world of erotic experience.

The male nipple, which carries less social and sexual baggage than the female nipple, is a centre of nerve endings that can easily be developed as a fast track connection to erotic heightened awareness.

Even for those who do not find their nipples particularly sensitive to erotic touch and stimulation, with some practice it becomes very possible to use the nipple as a primary erogenous zone. Some shirt fabrics can stimulate the nipple very effectively at every movement, again providing sustained erotic energy.

It’s easy to understand how constant engagement and attention to these body parts can be considered ‘kinky’ or ‘fetish’. But that is not a reason to deny the sensual and sexual potential. It’s a way of opening the energy of the mind and body to its full potential.

Moving to a bigger canvass, the nude human body can be the most powerful initial stimulant.

Unfortunately our society makes it very difficult to enjoy the sensual and sexual potential energy of a naked form, either solo or in company.

We’re exposed to nudity in advertising all the time but this is one of the instances where it’s implied ‘don’t try this at home’. It’s suggested that we may not measure up to the airbrushed magazine images, or that we should confine ourselves to a life which finds fault with enjoying even our own bodies.

But we know that it can be stimulating and erotic to be naked, especially among others, and to see others naked.

To a greater or lesser extent we’re all potential voyeurs or exhibitionists.

Communal nakedness is enjoyed by nudist clubs etc. but these organizations often deny the sexual potential of what they enjoy. This may be appropriate within family environments but here we’re talking about adult potentials.

Many kink and fetish environments allow and encourage nudity for entirely erotic, sensual and sexual potentials.

To enjoy the feeling of exposing one’s body, complete with the unhidden sexual energy of piercings, make-up, jewelry etc., or entirely unadorned, to others, is a powerful statement and invitation to understand that it’s good to be aware of and in control of the physical body. That it’s good to demonstrate physically what is going on mentally.

Taken as a lifestyle interest, solo and communal nudity is again a ‘fetish’ that is positive and can live in the mind 24/7.

As the physical and mental connections are developed and become part of life, rather than simply reserved for ‘special occasions’,  so it becomes increasingly possible to test boundaries and try experiences that at one time seemed too strange.

Now it is possible to be in environments where everybody can be understood as simply enjoying erotic stimulation for its own relaxation and erotic effects. That there is no ‘audience’ necessary. The activities are for the satisfaction of the individual. For those who are curious to watch, with permission, that is usually just fine. But the activities are part of the raising of erotic energy in ways that people have come to enjoy, often as a major component of their daily lives.

Perhaps the primary message is to welcome and encourage your fantasy. There is much energy to be found in dungeon play, BDSM, communal nudity, cross dressing, oil wrestling, tattoos, piercings, foot worship, mindful solo masturbation, communal masturbation, performance art, naked ritual etc. The possibilities are endless, limited only by imagination.

Here I’ve listed a few unconnected activities, entirely at random. There is no order of importance and the only thing the topics have in common is that they are enjoyed by many people who have found excellent outlets for their fantasy and sexual expression. It’s all worth exploring.

So, ‘fetishes and kinks’ are positive possibilities. It’s possible to enjoy many or just a few but practice does offer the chance to enhance and enjoy erotic energy when the massage table isn’t available.

I’m often asked to share in kinky and fetish fantasies as part of encouraging sexual and sensual energy and I am only too pleased to assist where I can, and to enjoy the experiences.

In Tantric group sessions we often talk about and explore such ideas and I’ve found so many new possibilities are opened in this way.

Always feel welcome to email or call on this general topic and let me know if you’d like to share or try something at a session.

The plan is always to encourage sensual and sexual awareness and to use this raised consciousness to enjoy all aspects of sexual life.

Colin

Tel: 250-984-7051                          Email: co.lins@outlook.com

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Communal Tantra

The post that follows this is an extract from an email that a young Tantric visitor sent to me about his experience with Tantric massage.

He asked it be posted with a password so if you’d like to read it just email or call for the p/w and I’ll be pleased to send it. (I’ve recently removed the password, with his permission)

He lives with his female partner and a gay male roommate. They all get on well, according to his description, and he asks some questions about the best future approaches to what they have found out about themselves and each other.

Reading his descriptions clearly suggest that he is fortunate to have found this living arrangement. It’s very likely that his interest in Tantra, massage and holistic bodywork have enabled his comfort level with sensual and sexual environments.

I plan to make a more detailed response to some of his questions and descriptions.

He identifies himself as a bisexual male in his 20’s, happily partnered with a girlfriend who accepts his sexual preferences. They share a rented house with a male in his 30’s who has recently ended a relationship with his gay partner.

The email talked about the adjustment in establishing living arrangements and allowing themselves to find ways to feel comfortable and relaxed in their own home environment.

They are all people of open minds, familiar with the potentials of their sensual and sexual lives. My friend, who has visited for massage and Tantric ritual instruction, a few times, has found himself with the opportunity to act on the possibilities of Tantric practice. Happily, while the result could have become overwhelming, he’s been received with enthusiasm, but looks to be sure that he continues in the most productive direction.

I do have some thoughts about his experience and will post them soon, but if any readers have any thoughts of their own/advice for him, please email me privately and I’ll make sure he receives the comments.

Colin

Tel: 250-984-7051                            Email: co.lins@outlook.com

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Extracted and edited from email

Colin,

Thanks for the appointments during the year and sorry I haven’t seen you recently. It’s been busy at school and time has been tight but I’ll come again soon.

I have been reading your blog and the password posts and thought I could write my experience and you can put it on the blog with a password.

You know my background and I thought it might be worth writing about because I’m not sure how usual or unusual it is. We’re all OK with me writing it and I’ve actually been helped by all here. We’re interested in anyone who wants to write to us who are in the same situation.

I’ve been attending university for 3 years now with a year to go. I met my girlfriend (name provided but changed to g/f) after a year at school. We go to a lot of the same classes.

We rented a house 18 months ago and thought we’d rent out the spare bedroom to make the rent work. I told my g/f that I like to get massage and am very interested in tantra.  Also that I’m bi. She doesn’t have a problem, obviously, or we wouldn’t be together and we both enjoy our sex lives together.

We needed to get at least one other renter to help with the rent and we thought we’d be able to get another student but ended up renting the room to a guy in his 30’s  (we’re in our 20’s) who works in a store downtown. I don’t want to mention the type of store but he’s a nice guy and I’ve shown him your blog. I don’t think he’s been to see you yet but I know he will soon. He wants to save some money so sharing a house works for him at the moment.

We share the lounge and kitchen etc. so we’ve often hung out just talking and getting to know each other. I’ll call him James but that’s not his real name.

When we were looking for a renter we wanted someone who was easy to be with and wouldn’t be uncomfortable around the house, so we said that they would have to be OK with the idea that the place was clothing optional. We chose James because his reaction wasn’t weird on the subject.

It took a month for things to settle into a routine and it was in the summer last year so we were around the house a lot. James was at work during the day and usually got back around 6. We didn’t have classes over the summer.

At first we tried to be extra considerate so he could feel free to hang in the lounge, get food etc. but it wasn’t exactly the best approach and so we asked him what would work for him. Luckily he said that he’d be most comfortable if we just existed as normal because the plan was to rent the house so that we could all live comfortably. Also he had his own room and TV to go to anyway.

We began watching movies together in the lounge later in the evenings and found that our mealtimes matched James so it’s all quite convenient. We don’t have much furniture and the place is clean but untidy which is OK most of the time.

The days were long and being summer and warm weather mostly we usually hung out in the house with just shorts and T-shirts. My g/f and I have books on bodywork, massage, tantra, art etc. and they’re in the lounge for anyone to read. James had begun to look through them and we got to talking about bodywork one evening.

To make this short we found out that James also was into massage and had done a lot of yoga in his past. We talked about tantra and relaxation etc. and about how we all seemed to get along and that it was a good living situation. James had said before that he was gay but had split from his partner in the previous year.

During evening conversations we started to talk about some more personal things and the conversations flowed very easily and we all found it quite sexy. One evening James left us to take a shower and came back into the room with only his towel wrapped around him.

We resumed the conversation which hadn’t really ended because my g/f and I had continued looking through massage books.

James saw what we were looking at and said that at some point we should get a massage table and try some massage exchange. Because I’m always open for massage and so is my g/f we said that we’d give James a massage then if he wanted. I’m not sure I’d have said this if I hadn’t had a couple of beers.

We cleared some space on the floor, which is still mostly covered with cushions and books, and James stretched out, face down, on the floor. My g/f took off his towel, found some oil that we keep around and we started massaging James.

Although we’re not strangers to massage I suddenly realized this was the first time I’d actually been with my g/f in a massage situation (or any potential sexual situation) with another male. I knew she could be into this but wanted to make sure she was completely OK with the possibilities.

I tried to recall as much of the tantric approach as I could and I told James that would be our approach to this.

We poured some oil onto James’ back and my g/f separated his legs enough to allow some oil to trickle between his cheeks.

Then she took my hand and guided it between his legs and held it there, with hers. The intention was to make sure that I understood she was cool with this. James was having a great time.

We oiled and massaged James’s back, butt and legs from top to toe. Eventually my g/f said that we should start on his front and asked James if he wanted his towel back. It seemed a crazy question but she intended it politely. Anyway he ignored it and just turned over. We’d seen James naked going to and from the shower to his bedroom etc. and we hadn’t particularly avoided covering up if we were moving around the house but this was the first time we’d actually done anything that would have a sensual or sexual dimension.

As he turned over James asked us both if this was OK with us and my g/f said it was with her and she didn’t think I would have a problem. Of course I didn’t have a problem. If I had any concern it was that although I’d told my g/f I could get turned on in the company of some guys and I thought that could fit me into the bi category, this was the first time when she would put it to the test and I didn’t want to offend either her or James.

I think my g/f quickly read my mind and said that since I was the ‘tantra expert’ I should take the lead. We’d both stayed in our shorts and tops so far and actually I felt we were overdressed because this had gone so far.  Again seeing my hesitation my g/f said that what she’d read of tantra in my books we ought to make James feel as comfortable as he could be so that he could enjoy the experience so she told him that she was enjoying the massage and now seeing him naked. Also whether he wanted this to be full body.

The answer was not necessary so we poured on the oil. James is a good looking guy, He’s got less hair than me and is quite slim. Since I’ve been in his position getting massage I was imagining what he’d be feeling. I’m still working on not cumming too soon as you know and James seemed to have things under control.

We both started on his chest and although my g/f had told me to take the lead she was the one moving my hands down James’s torso when it seemed I was spending too long on the chest area.

As we massaged James’s belly and moved into his pubic area I realized we were both waiting to see who would make the first stroke of his cock. Looking back on this it seems we were being a bit stupid and that’s where I’m interested in your opinion.

I was finding the time very erotic but was still concerned to show that to my g/f. It was James who broke the ice and reached for my dick and told me to lose the clothes. I looked at my g/f who said it was fine with her if I wanted, so I got naked. My g/f made some sort of joke about waiting too long for this moment and took off her top. She’d been wearing a long T shirt covering some briefs which she kept on.

We worked on James’s cock and balls together while he played with me while getting the massage from us both. After we’d worked on his legs and feet getting back often to his cock, I could see he was ready to cum any time. My g/f could see this of course and that I was also ready to join him.

Around this point we ended the massage and my g/f asked whether I would kneel over her face and James over her tits and we should cum on her at the same time.

That’s what we did. There was enough to almost drown her.

I hope you don’t find this pornographic. I’ve left out a lot of the detail and description and I’m not sure whether it fits with tantra. I’m hoping you’ll email me with any thoughts.

We’re all still living at the house. We continue with our lives normally and we’re not a traditional ‘threesome’ because we don’t share the same bed. We do hang out together in the evenings and my g/f and I sometimes have sex with James there. Sometimes my g/f asks James and me to play with each other so there’s a lot of physical contact between us and a great comfort level. We like to watch each other so we’re probably voyeurs and exhibitionists.

We did get a massage table between us. Maybe that’s why I haven’t been to you. By now there’s not much we don’t know about each other, physically, but I’m interested to find out more about the next steps in tantric massage and how we can find any new things to do.

James is interested as well. Also my g/f has told me that she does get off on seeing us all together although we never try to have sex with James. He and I have been quite intimate but only ever when all three of us are together. James’s position is that he very much likes my g/f as a friend and loves that she allows him to play with me. So it’s all cool.

It won’t last forever now because we’ll finish in the next year and probably move. That’s why I’d be interested in what tantra offers when we don’t have James around. Also I’m interested in some further instruction in massage techniques.

You can edit this description however you want and post it on your blog if you like. I think our situation might not be so unusual but people don’t talk about these things often. We’ve been pretty lucky with it all. I want to keep it that way so you might be able to keep us on track.

(The email is signed but I’ve cut it down in size and left his name out. I’ll call him Bill for this posting. We’re in touch. I expect to see him again soon)

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